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What a Good Day
Hey! I’m breaking my little hiatus to share some good news. For the past many, many months, something has been stealing much of my attention away from writing.
That something? Meet Crude, the little lip balm company that could. That can!
Today, Daily Candy covered us:
And usually I wouldn’t encourage the gossip train, but let’s play telephone on this one.
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See You
Evidently, I can’t be bothered to put words here anymore. What? Words are ha-ard.
I don’t know what this place is anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I still like the zebra. (Isn’t she cute? Yes, she is.) But I used to come here to complain about things and I’ve recently discovered that complaining about things isn’t all that fun. And it’s really dorky to not complain about things. And then Eric was all, put the stuff you cook on there, just so you can remember how to make it again. So I did. Twice.
But I’m not a food bloggity blogger. Can’t use words like mouth feel or sumptuous. Just. Like. To. Eat. is all.
And even though I’m nicer now (in theory) and I like people more and being cranky less, I certainly don’t want to talk about any of that. And then there’s that whole work thing distracting me from this talking aimlessly about nothing to no one in particular thing.
This summer will be packed, as I mentioned earlier, with tons upon tons of bbqs, and as I did not mention earlier, with sailing and with non-bbq parties and all sorts of other things that have me more interested in them than this. “All things are cyclical.” (Are all things, really?) I guess what I’m saying is,
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Wah Wah Wah
It’s true, some people truly are disgusting, but when did NYers become such sniveling weenies? Evidently, we’re just dying to whine about everything.
1. Seat Hogs
Who among us, when the opportunity presented itself, hasn’t tried to carve out a little extra space in a crowded world? You want a seat? The magic words are EXCUSE ME. Voila!
2. Train Pigs
You hate people eating? Fucking deal. You live with 8 million other people, and you’re not going to like what everyone does. I hate it too, to a gaggy degree, but have a little empathy. Someone who prefers consuming food within our filthy subway system has bigger problems than your opinion of her, even if it is just transient low blood sugar.
3. Subway Douchery
Formerly funny, now a big win of reportage is a girl eating a quarter watermelon? Sure, it’s a strange choice, but the area around her isn’t even polluted with watermelon debris.
I get why we need to commiserate — living here can be hard. But if it’s not rewarding enough to shut up about all this petty, unfunny stuff, there is a lovely home for you in the suburbs.
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Notice
To the mothers who prefer “bebe” over the traditional:
1. Was baby not cute enough to begin with? (It was.)
2. You’re forcing me to imagine your little one dolled up in the slutty lycra stylings of Bebe.